Reality bites.

If you read this blog often enough, you know that I choose to see humor in things.  I choose to laugh instead of cry (when appropriate). My personal Facebook profile photo says: choose happy.  I have that to remind myself that at the core, that is who I am.

Some of our realities bite.  I’m guessing that is true for every living creature on this great planet.  I joke about meatballs and pee issues because, well because if I don’t laugh, I’ll cry hysterically.  I wish Jake’s reality was different.  I wish that he was not losing control of his body so early on in his life.  I’m constantly asking the vet to confirm the process is not painful for him.  When his legs give out, despite how often it happens now, he still turns to me with a terrified look on his face.  Me crying won’t ease his fear.  So I say ‘you’re ok bud’, and I believe that he is with all that I am. I set him upright and send him back on his way. There is no other choice, this is how life goes for him, and thus for me.

You know that saying, that you don’t get what you want, you get what you need.  That has always rung true when it comes to Melvin.  He is nothing that I expected yet everything about him makes me and my life better and brighter.  He has shown me the ‘way’.  From him I have learned that not every itch can or should be scratched. Recently, I realized the same is true about Jake. Every struggle, every challenge, he makes me a better person. My little comedian helps to maintain the humor.  From him I now know that into every life, some pee must fall.

In full disclosure, I get frustrated.  I don’t enjoy pee, it’s one reason I have no interest in the puppy years.  I am a bit of clean freak and pee tends to haunt me.  During the belly band struggle, there have been a lot of accidents.  Sometimes I have to go outside and scream (at the universe, not at Jake).  Carrying him is not always the easiest task either.  I’m still nervous when I carry him down every morning.  I get sad when he struggles.

But when frustration or sadness creep in, I’m reminded that he’s mine for a reason.  It’s not just me getting him through, he is part of my path too.  You commit to unconditional love and the universe is bound to test it.  Reality may bite sometimes, but life is sweet and it’s too short to not seek out the joy every chance you get.

This past weekend was stressful.  I tried so many different belly bands for Jake, I went out and bought toddler underwear for him (he’s not human so that was a huge waste of $$) and there were a lot of accidents/drippage.  I walked outside to scream – a lot.  But then, an angel read about my porn star’s issue, reached out, and said she might be able to help.  More about that in a future post, but let’s just say this savior of ours brightened our day, lifted our spirit and is SIRIUS-ly awesome!

Happy Tuesday!

43 thoughts on “Reality bites.

  1. You don’t get the dog you want, you get the dog you need. And who needs you. I have to remind myself that through all the frustrations and uncertainty and the pain of watching something I love so much suffer through the physical difficulties that come his way. The complete hurt of not being able to help or fix them, and knowing all you can do is offer your love and comfort and hope that’s enough for them. Know that Jake was brought to you for a reason. Because your a loving person who will help him make the most out of his life. We love you!
    Corbin’s momma, Jenn

    • Couldn’t agree more! I assumed that after Melvin, the universe would give me an ‘easier’ dog. Instead, the universe felt it had trained me well and I should keep on going! I will say that ‘knowing’ you and Corbin has made me a better person as well. We are with you my virtual sister!

  2. I’m so glad you got some help – hopefully it will make things easier. We are thinking of you.

    Monty and Harlow

  3. Tracey, you are an amazing woman with the right outlook on life, regardless of how hard it is. Your compassion and strength seems to grow as the issues get more difficult to solve and I commend you for that. Keep that beautiful chin up because you are so right, we are learning and growing every time a new challenge comes our way.

  4. Thank you for being there for him. So many give up too soon. He will tell you when he has had enough – and you’ll be at peace someday when the time is right. Then you’ll look back and think of every pee-stained day as a gift meant just for you.

  5. Gah – we love you! We count ourselves lucky to not have any major medical issues, but our pooches have issues all their own. We often lament when a friend gets a “perfect” dog while ours are riddled with “personality.” But then we think about how few people could have truly worked through Ed’s issues and where that would have left him and then we’re so glad we found him first! Whenever he gets into something or does something naughty, we always say (really, we say it verbally. out loud) #ifyoudontlaughyoucry – it’s our way of making something so frustrating into our own little inside joke.

  6. So sorry for the struggles…we have a house of special needs animals, so I understand, at least a little. Blessings on you for keeping on keeping on. Your dogs are blessed.

    • Amen sister!!! Just wanted to be sure that everyone knows that struggle and issues do not have to equate to sadness and negativity all the time. For anyone thinking of rescuing a dog with special needs, life can be more full of joy than you ever imagined!

  7. After reading yesterdays post, I was like – huh, I wonder if Sirius would make belly bands. Because I know Jake would have one in EVERY design possible. If this is true, then you’ve/he’s hit the JACKPOT! Sirius is Sirius-ly Awesome!!! 🙂

  8. I, too, think these special guys find a way to our homes and there’s a reason for that. Many times, I think that delivery got garbled in transmission and they were meant to go to my neighbor or someone close by.but no, they’re always for us. Like so many of you I am a sucker for the underdog. While there are many struggles (I didn’t even now they made a pee light!) the joys far outweigh the bad. I wouldn’t have traded them for anything!

  9. He is so very lucky to have you as his mama! Maybe a bucket list sorta day would make you feel better…take him out for a day of things that he would love to do. It’ll help you see how much happiness he feels, and it might help you feel refreshed! I can only imagine how hard it is to watch him struggle, but just know that you are a major blessing to him, and he couldn’t have a better human!

  10. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I can DEFINITELY relate to the pee thing, we are dealing with Sarge ‘leaking’ basically every time he’s doing something other than sleeping (and lately, it’s been in our bed WHILE he’s sleeping too!). We just ordered a belly band and are hoping that will help! Hope your new solution works (and maybe I can steal it too!)
    And P.S. It takes a SPECIAL person to care for and love a dog (or two!) with special needs! You’re awesome.

    • I went through this with Max towards the end of his life, belly bands fit larger dogs much better! It takes a special person to take in a senior dog with leakage in his future, you are awesome too!!!!

  11. Everyone–with two legs, four legs, wings, or fins–needs someone special like you in his or her life. I am so thankful that Melvin and Jake have you in their lives, and I am so thankful that you have them. My first Golden Retriever, Talbot, had horrible skin allergies. When Harper Lee hit nine months with no signs of that little trauma, I thought to myself, “Yes. No problems with this one.” And then just past nine moths she was diagnosed with hip and elbow dysplasia. Although I wish like anything that Talbot and Harper Lee could have been healthy, “perfect” dogs, I wouldn’t trade them for the world. I’m thankful that somehow they came into my life and I came into their lives. Every day is a gift, even the ones that make you scream outside. 🙂

    • I agree with you wholeheartedly! If I had not taken Melvin, I am almost certain he would have been given up again. Some challenges were meant to be faced with the person(s) who will truly promise forever, no matter how ugly it gets.

  12. I’m sorry to hear of the struggles, and I’n so impressed with your wonderful positive attitude and patience. It takes a big amount of love and courage to fight and special people to care of our fur kids in their time of need.

    All that I went through with Sasha and her cancer, I’d do it all over again in a heart beat. Now we are going through Argus having accidents while we’re at work (at least its on the same spot!) and he’s going senile which can be frustrating but you just love them even more because if we were going through the same, they would not give up on us. Ever.

    Keep up that attitude, I wholeheartedly believe that our attitude influence our dogs.

    Hugs 🙂

    • I was actually thinking of a few of our readers as i wrote that post, you included. My dad always says that you never know what someone else’s struggles are like, you can only bond over the that fact that everyone, everywhere struggles at some point. It’s always nice to admit that some days are hard and have others say ‘yes, yes they are!’. Then we go back to the joy.

  13. I can understand how it’s even harder on someone who’s a clean freak, being one myself and hence adopting an older dog, not puppy. You are one awesome woman, and it’s ok to scream, just don’t hurt yourself doing it. 🙂 Even if it doesn’t get better you get stronger.

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