What’s up my peoples? Life here is GREAT!
For a week or two she kept taking me places where I’d fall asleep and wake up wonkier than usual. I started worrying that aliens had abducted me but she assured me that it was just for some tests (wait, isn’t that what aliens would do?) To be honest, I love a good nap so no complaints here!
A few times when I woke up from the wonky state, her eyes were leaking but then she fixed her eyes and now it’s pretty much just ‘love on Jakie 24/7’. As it should be.
Seriously, here is what I have put together…leaky eyes leads to:
- Her laying on the floor with me all the time! I love it!
- Peanut butter. A lot of peanut butter! She says ‘life is short, eat the peanut butter’ and I say ‘yes ma’am can I have another’
- Love. I mean I already felt a lot of love from her but now she’s singing and dancing and she picks me up and we dance together and I’m not gonna lie, we could be on dancing with the stars! She usually sings that song that is on the radio…”I’ll be here to save the day, Superman’s got nothin on me, I’m only one call awayyyyyyyyyyyyy”.
- Stories about Melvin. Lately she has been telling me how alike me and the big guy are, how we stole her heart and she wouldn’t have it any other way. Any mention of Melvin, makes me swoon so hard. I love him, more than peanut butter.
So all is great here! My legs drag sometimes but it don’t bother me. I just pull them around like the sultry beast that I am. I make wonky look sexy. True story.
Her rolly bag came out and she put stuff in it so that means that Tayler is coming to stay with me and that is seven different shades of awesome! Unlike my brother who got upset when she’d leave, I do not care as much. She will leave, Tayler will come, it will be awesome, she will come back, that’s awesome too. It’s all good up in my hood!
PS. here are some photos of me that prove my sexiness.
Sexy evidence #1. How is this for ‘the thinker’, Rodin? (Although I say ‘thinker’ she says ‘stinker’. She is not funny.)
Sexy evidence #2. Some are not confident for a close up but when you’re as incredibly attractive as I am…it don’t matter.
Sexy evidence #3. I dare anyone who claims that neck waddles are not sexy to look at this and not see hotness. Boom, told you. My band name should be ‘neck waddles by the fire’.