There are not many times when I feel outnumbered by the dogs. By outnumbered I mean able to remain in control — I obviously know that two is more than one.
This weekend I took both dogs to the vet. I was so outnumbered that I may have PTSD. Issues working against me:
- Jake does not enjoy other dogs, often other dogs are at the vet (shocking I know). If he see’s another dog he redirects to Melvin. When he did that this weekend I fell over a chair trying to deflect him. NOT CUTE.
- Melvin does not enjoy cats. When he hears them, he gets hungry. WHY DO CATS ALWAYS HAVE TO MEOW WHEN WE ARE THERE?? WHYYYYYYYYY?
- It does not matter if Jake has just gone two seconds before we walk into the vet, he will always, 100% of the time, shoot out meatballs while we are inside the vet as a passive aggressive way of communicating that he does not enjoy this sort of day trip. On Saturday, he threw out what seem to be several hundred meatballs, fell into it, scurried over it and even managed to get some on his face, all within the span of 1.42 seconds. Melvin was at the same time frantically searching for the ‘meow’. This was a very dark moment in the day. I had to clean the mess up while holding the dogs (thankfully two women in the waiting room took pity on me and helped hold them while I gagged uncontrollably since Jake managed to squash crap into every single crevice in the floor). I then had to bathe Jake at the vet in the bathroom sink. With hand soap.
It’s Monday and I’m still exhausted. And I swear I can still smell ‘it’.