You know that game, ‘would you rather’? Before HGTV, when asked if I’d rather give up TV or music, every time I’d say TV. I am a music always on type of person. Even when music is not on, I’m singing, or humming or it’s playing in my head. I often dance. True story.
Music accompanies me. Through long car rides, through flights, through workdays, walks and late nights on the patio.
Right now, for the last couple of months, whenever I hear Ed Sheeran’s Photograph, I immediately think of Melvin. And that song makes me feel like he’s near, and that makes me strong, and happy and mindful of the loss in way that starts to bridge me to being able to think of him more often, look at photographs, watch a video or two.
I leave the radio on for Jake when I leave. I do not discriminate on what station, whatever station will come in best on the little clock radio I have plugged in next to him. And every day when I come inside the house, the precise time that I am still learning to accept that Melvin will not be greeting me, the moment that I unlock the door and take a deep breath to accept the visual, wagging, void, that song is almost always playing when I walk in. And that makes me grateful. Because accepting that I can’t see him anymore, does not mean he’s not still here. That song greeting me time after time, is my Joy.
And that song, will become another song. For me, there is most definitely a glorious soundtrack to my life!