Vacation was wonderful, it was exactly what we needed.  Jake loved every minute of being at the beach house.  It was relaxing and the weather was perfect.

There were two big hurdles that Jake and I overcame on this trip.

1. Jake took his first car ride without Melvin.  The trip down there did not go well.  Jake hyperventilated for five hours straight and I had to make two calls to our vet.  I honestly thought we were going to have to find an emergency vet along the way.  He eventually calmed down and fell asleep but the whole drive I just kept thinking, he’d have been totally fine if Melvin had been in the backseat with him.  But as it was, Jake had to get through that journey, and he did.  And on the way home, he slept the whole way!  He found his braves and I’m so proud of him.
2. As for me, this was the first time returning from the beach (in as far as I can recall), that Melvin was not at home waiting for me.  The whole drive home I would anticipate seeing him, even though I knew he wasn’t here. It’s funny how extreme hope can almost alter reality. Just like Jake, I had to conquer that part of our trip.

We got through.

On the drive home, I thought a lot about the current state of the void in our lives right now.  Not just missing Melvin, but missing the love (received and given). It would be easy to get another dog right this very minute, just to get back on the love track.  But the truth of the truth is, I still just want Melvin.  I don’t want a new dog, I want my dog.  And I’m not angry or sad about that (Ok I’m a little sad), I just sorta matter-of-factly, don’t see another dog here right now. And I know wholeheartedly that will change, probably in an instant.  And I’m excited for that day to come. But I am equally happy to sit in the warmth of my Melvin memories and to see Jake through his first weeks of being an only dog. He is really coming into his new self, seeking affection, learning to listen, becoming brave!  It’s enough to enjoy that part right now.

And just in case that last paragraph made anyone sad, let me take this moment to make you laugh.  While at the beach, I was kneeling down to change Jake’s diaper.  I was behind him, leaning over to be sure that little Jake was tucked in when all of a sudden, he farted…towards my open mouth!  There were witnesses.  It’s was pretty grossly epic. Ahhhhh, life with Jake!

GOING TO THE BEACH: Getting ready to hyperventilate Jake. (this photo was taken right after I carried him to the car and he proceeded to poop on me).  Good times! 

RETURNING FROM THE BEACH: ‘Totally got this’ Jake! My brave boy!