Recent explosions.

In the past week, four things have happened that I would rather had not.

  1. We came in from a morning bathroom break and I went into the loo (for no fewer than about 30 seconds).  While I was in there, I could hear Jake ‘swimming’ it’s what happens when he can’t catch his footing and he’s fighting to get his legs upright.  This noise is nothing new.  I came out of the loo, looked to left where the noise was coming from to find that Jake (in 30 seconds) had poop’d, fallen backwards into it, scooted around for several feet in it in an effort to get upright, stepped in it and did some ‘swimming’ with his poop covered hind legs.  He managed to spread poop into a 5 foot by 7 foot area, mostly on rug.  HOW? WHY?  It took me over an hour to clean up. He gave new meaning to the term ‘shit storm’.
  2. One night, Jake pee’d through two cloth diaper pads, two maxi pads and a waterproof diaper, thus soaking through two bed covers and into the bed. He alerted me to this problem at 2am.
  3. On a night when a migraine was trying to kill me and I was in extreme pain and very stomach sick, Jake decided to spew his full weight in throw-up all over his bed and condo.  As I was cleaning it up, mind you, I go blind in one eye during migraines and was VERY stomach sick, I ended up throwing up on Jake (because i could not see him).  Low point in our lives folks.  I had to crawl with him into the shower at 3am. With a migraine.  Each of us blind in one eye.  No bueno.
  4. Jake poop’d on my foot. The end.

Try and be more glamorous than us, we dare you!


26 thoughts on “Recent explosions.

  1. Thank you for the smile on my very upsetting day 🙂
    Merry Christmas to you and Jake and remember the days can only get better when you are both together <3 <3

    • When you don’t have a choice, you just learn to roll with it! Also, Jake’s eyes get about four times bigger than they normally are when poop starts coming out so I know he has no control — and that makes me laugh!

    • I learned a long time ago to laugh at these moments, otherwise, we’d spend way too much crying about them. Life with Jake has taught me to embrace the saying ‘it is what it is’!

  2. When Monday rolls around and I’m feeling all defeatist about the world, you and Jake sure have a way of helping me keep things in perspective. My heart goes out to the rug. You and Jake too. But really, the rug most of all.

  3. I completely empathize with you! We have a 13.5 year old, fecal incontinent female Labrador. She is our heart, but some days it gets pretty exasperating. We take her out frequently to do her business, but she usually waits until she is coming back in the door to poo. Or sometimes she is lying on the sofa and here it comes! I don’t know how many times we have thrown a hand under her butt out of pure instinct to keep it from hitting furniture or the rug. We have learned that hands are much more easily cleaned and deodorized than any fabric. Not to mention the lovely decor of our house. Every piece of furniture is covered in bedsheets and waterproof pads. We love her though, and will continue to do whatever is necessary to keep her comfortable. Merry Christmas to you and yours!

    • Stop. I love your love for her. Max was the same way, he’d wake up and there would be a puddle and when he’d push to stand up…turds. I called them love nuggets. Loving them well at that age, is everything that is right in the world. They are perfection. Merry, merry to you!

  4. OH man…I’m so sorry! I’m laughing and feeling sad for you guys, that’s a ruff week!
    I hope you have a wonderful Christmas, thank you again so much for our card we love looking at Jake’s handsome squishy face!!

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